NHL 2K6 is in stores at a bargain price ($30), and it is reasonably competently-made, so it will sell well and will land, gaily beribboned, under many trees this Christmas. The people unwrapping it will be happy, for they will have a competently-made hockey game to play. Fondness and good feelings will fill the air.

That's OK. Really it is. It would be mean-spirited to begrudge anyone a little holiday fun. But NHL 2K6 is not the best hockey game of the season, and it is not even any better than its predecessor, last year's ESPN NHL 2K5. It is a little bit worse, actually, and the sad news is that the decline is the fault of two Canadian icons.

In between 2K5 and 2K6, Electronic Arts snapped up the exclusive ESPN licence, which meant that this year's game would have to do without the voice talents of Gary Thorne and Bill Clement. Full credit to the producers, who aimed high and landed Harry Neale and Bob Cole of Hockey Night in Canada. Here's the thing, though: Neale and Cole may be pretty good as broadcasters, but they are lousy, lousy actors. Put them in a recording booth and tell them that, no, there's not actually a hockey game going on, but they must pretend there is and read these lines as if they're in the broadcast booth, and all the classic HNIC excitement vanishes, giving way to something vastly duller. "Wooden" doesn't begin to describe it.

Try "Shatnerian," only without the bluster. When Bob calls a puck-drop, it sounds like this: "The. Pens. Win. The. Face. Off."

After a big hit: "Harry. He. Was. Definitely. Trying. To. Get. Away. With. Some. Extra. Curricular. Activity. There."

Simply to fill the air: "The. Maple Leafs. Are Making. Tonight's game. An exciting. Game. To watch."

Clearly, each man recorded each of the words in a separate session, and some clever software is stitching them into a sentence. That's reasonable. That's how video game voiceovers have worked for years. Trouble is, Bob and Harry are much, much worse at it than, say, Gary Thorne and Bill Clement are. The result is a game that Will. Not. Stop. Annoying You.

It's a pity, really, because the underlying game, the one you will discover when you disable the commentary, is quick-paced and fun and intuitive under the thumbs. Like 2K5, it's a game you can pick up quickly and immediately feel comfortable playing, even if you haven't read the instructions. The buttons you use to shooting and passing and check and block shots are somehow right where your thumbs want them to be. The learning curve is short. The fun is immediate and reliable.

But. Harry Neale will not stop telling us that "that save was underrated." By whom, Harry? The fans who failed to say "whoa!" loudly enough? The announcers on some yet-to-be-broadcast highlight show?

Other buts: Virtual Pat Quinn and Virtual Eddie Olczyk look just like each other. The rosters are sorely out of date. Lots. Of. Teams. Have. Watched. That. Third. Period. Lead. Evap. Orate.

None of these is a dealbreaker. The game is fun. You will like playing it. The ice is shiny and the uniforms are prettily rendered. The sounds of the rink (as opposed to the sounds of the broadcast booth) are authentic and exciting. It's just that, for even less than $30, you could have essentially the same play mechanics and much better announcing: just buy a used copy of ESPN NHL 2K5. Or you could have good announcing and great (albeit different) play mechanics by picking up NHL 06.

It's a shame, all this nickling and diming. At this point, hockey games are so polished that they might as well be commodities. Finding a reason to choose one over another often comes down to price, or to a little irritant that grows in the mind until it is all-consuming. Bad voice acting never ruined a game. But this is 2005. Aren't we past that? Don't we have production values now?