It is no longer possible for any of us to take ninjas seriously. Not after the indignities of such films as Three Ninjas and American Ninja. Then again, it never really was possible. Ninjas are like monkeys; they improve any movie in which they appear, but they do so at the expense of street cred.

You will never ever find a critic or film-festival enthusiast who will admit to liking a ninja or monkey flick. But you know in your heart that no matter what triumphs and heartaches the cinema offers you, you would much rather watch them if they also contained a naughty little bonobo and some black-clad martial arts assassins in little toe slippers.

None of this tells you much about Ninja Gaiden, but it is useful background. Your streed cred will evaporate utterly the moment you touch this game, but you will find yourself so transfixed and so utterly entertained that this will not disturb you in the least.

Ninja Gaiden is a video game all about ninjas. Specifically, it is a video game about one lone brave ninja named Ryu Hayabusa and his battles against, er, evil. Here, "evil" is shorthand for "the ninjas and other soldiers and fighters who play for the other team." There is a back story of sorts, involving something called the Dark Dragon Blade. The DDB is full of Supernatural Power and could unleash all the fury of hell itself if it fell into the wrong hands. It has been stolen and is on its way into the wrong hands. Cue young Ryu Hayabusa, on a one-man crusade to get it back. His family apparently looks after it when it is not in the wrong hands.

Getting the DDB back goes much the same way any one-man crusade in any video game goes. Ryu must beat up a bunch of evil bad guys, then he must beat up another bunch of evil bad guys, then he must beat up another bunch of evil bad guys, then he must kill a super evil, super powerful, super duper evil bad guy. Then he must repeat the process 10 or 15 times. It is the classic complete-the-level-then-fight-the-boss-then-go-on-to-the-next-level formula you know well.

In the opening moments Ryu finds himself near the entrance to a ninja fortress. As he approaches the door, evil ninjas dressed in brown leap out and wave their swords at him. We (as Ryu) swing our own sword, jumping high into the air and slashing the blade forward and back. The evil brown ninjas fight for a moment, but soon disappear in little puff-clouds of blood. We go in the door and down the hall. More ninjas attack. We throw some throwing stars at them, then follow through with more swordplay. More puff-clouds of blood. We are feeling very tough.

We notice that we have spectacular acrobatic skills. We can right vertically up walls. We can do backflips. We can climb high into the air bouncing from one wall to another and back. We carry magical potions that heal us when we have taken a throwing star to the temple. We are just like Spider-Man, except that we wear little toe slippers and do not have a wisecracking sense of humour. We feel powerful and serious.

So yes, when you step away from the controller, you are overwhelmed with the uncoolness of it all. But what fun it is in the heat of the moment, with flashing blades and impossible feats of strength and agility.

There is a real old-fashioned puzzle adventure here too, in which you must find hidden keys and unlock secret rooms, where you must look in every dark corner and in every locked box for the little trinkets and prizes that will open doors and increase your strength. Lots of video games have activities like these, but only in good video games are they as entertaining as they are here. Basically you alternate between the thinky bits, in which you must figure out what to do next, and the fighty bits, in which you are tough. The combination is delightful and challenging and leaves a sweet aftertaste.

Unfortunately, Ninja Gaiden is rather short on monkeys.